With apologies to Edgar Allan Poe
Once upon a midnight dreary,
while I pondered, weak and weary,
Many unpaid bills and letters
from my local big-box store —
While I nodded, nearly napping,
suddenly there came a tapping,
As of someone gently rapping,
rapping at my office door.
“’Tis some visitor,” I muttered,
“tapping at my office door —
Only this and nothing more.”
Hard it was to count my blessings; tired, I was still obsessing,
Worried sick about the morrow. Vainly I had sought to borrow
Backhoes, skid steers, excavators — tools I needed for the pour,
For the concrete pour tomorrow — (deadline I could not ignore).
Daily problems now beset me, avalanching, more and more:
Ibuprophen — still I’m sore.
Was I cheerful? No sir! no sir! — Christmas looming ever closer,
Weather’s yucky; snow is sopping; idiots and fools are shopping.
From Seattle to Atlanta, every corner has a Santa.
My financial state was dire; unpaid bills were piling higher;
Christmas carols always blaring — with these woes, I was past caring.
Ibuprophen! I need more!
Now the wind was loudly whipping through the leaky entry door,
Reminding me the weatherstripping had worn out — it was no more.
“When will I have time to seal up holes through which the breezes pour?
Air that seeks the unsealed cracks, the leaky window, broken door?
As the stack effect gets stronger, fuel bills increase more and more.
Chills affect me to my core.”
Soberly assessing matters, with my business all in tatters,
(Thinking, in my leaky hovel: “Am I in a Dickens novel?”)
Saddened by my future prospects — still I saw the comic aspects
As I heard the gentle tapping, rapping at my office door.
Winter winds were cruelly nipping, tearing at my…
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12 Comments
Thanks Master
I'm blown away by another masterpiece!
I am bit pedanticer.
Who knew we've been graced by the poet laureat of Vermont all these years, composing verse as he shivers by the wood stove, scribbling with his quill pen upon a piece of slate? Inspired, perhaps, by a bit of Terry's hemp?
Well done, Martin!!
Insane Martin
Bravo
Brilliant
Trips much better off the tongue than The Telltale Temperature/RH Data Logger.
Careful now...
Or the Christmas cheer extremists may come string you up with tinsel ;-)
Poet and didn't even know it!
Nice job Martin! ;0)
A Poet, a Raven and Man's best friend, a Blower Door
I've been inspired
Fantastic! Btw, it's good to
Fantastic! Btw, it's good to know others also have the good taste to have a Lstiburek bust sitting prominently in their home. I got mine at Home Depot. They make an excellent gift for people in the know at this season. I'm a little worried about it's provenance though. It's extremely light weight, as if it's made of polystyrene. It's also blue. I haven't yet located the signature of the artist on it but am sure I will find it soon.
Talented Writer you are!
Not only a prolific writer of green non-fiction, but a creative poet as well!
I enjoy reading your articles very much, very informative and easy to read.
Merry Christmas/Happy Hanukkah/Happy Holidays to Holladay and to all!
Poetic Irony
Adding to the commendations of others, I agree.... Nicely Done!
And, just completed my blower door test last week!
Merry Christmas
Where Building Science and Poetry Intersect...
Well-done! I've always enjoyed reading this blog but you've outdone yourself with this. I think I'm going to treat our office to a dramatic reading on Christmas Eve.
A great year end tradition
Thank you Martin. I look forward to this each year now. No pressure, but I can't wait 'til next year.
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